Me vs. the lawnmower....guess who won.

OK, so originally the plan was for me to hire our neighbors lawn service to keep up with our yard.

I know, I know. Pretty lame huh?

I have a 15 year old who is totally capable. But in 2006 when Tom was in Iraq, I had Kasey mow the grass. I sent him out 3 additional times on the same day to FIX what he "missed".

This year, it was not a battle I really wanted to fight. Since I personally didn't want to do it, hiring someone was the next best thing.

Only the lawn service has never called me back. I talked with my neighbor about their lack of customer service and she said she would try to call them. Apparently this is a small mom and pop shop type of business, and well apparently they don't need the business THAT bad or they didn't want a temporary customer which is what I would be because my man IS coming back in July. Right Babe? JULY!

Anywho, our yard was quickly resembling a jungle and since Chloe was getting lost in said Jungle, I took it upon myself to ..dun dun dun....

Moooooow the Graaaaasssssssss

Ohh the horror!!!!!!!! I have several errands to run Saturday and my plan was the knock out the grass in the afternoon.

I open the garage, and pull out the lawn mower.

We have a riding mower but hell if I know how the damn thing runs, or how to drive it, or hell how to even start it.

So it is the push mower for me.

I have used this mower before. In '04 when Tom was in Qatar I mowed the grass a total of ONE time. Tom left late in the summer and it really didn't rain that much. Go me!

I have the mower out in my driveway. I look around the neighborhood and there are several men taking care of their lawns. HA I am woman hear me mow!

There is a little button on the front of the mower you are supposed to press in and out exactly 3 times before you start the mower.

One, two, three..times I push said button.

I grip the starting cable and pull with all my might and...

it doesn't start.
I pull again.
it doesn't start.
I pull again.
it doesn't start.
I pull again.
it doesn't start.

At this point I am thinking if I pull any harder my arm is going to pull out of socket.

I am not a wussy girl. When Tom needs help moving something heavy, he doesn't call his friends to help, nooooo he says "babe, I need your help". Since in this house my name is Babe, I help.

Together we have moved the content of our entire house to a new one, including a snap-on tool box FULL of tools. I have helped him hoist cabinets up with my shoulders, carry in new furniture, and a new stove.

I'm not NEW to physical labor, I am just not a big fan of it and try to get out of it at every turn which is why I wanted to hire the lawn people to begin with and if this sentence runs on any longer I think my BFFs English teacher husband might make me take his class. Hi Darrin!

So what do I do when I cannot get the lawn mower started?

I call Tom. Because he can from the East Coast right?

His first words are "Why the hell are you trying to cut the grass"

ROFLMAO

Really Babe, that is the exact question I kept asking myself too!

His first question is "Did you put gas in it?"

Heck yes, that is the first thing I checked! DUH!

Then he has me explain to him what I did step by step. So I told him I pushed the button thingy 3 times, tried to start it a few times and nothing. So I pushed the button thingy again about 3 or 10 times and tried to start it again about 10 or 50 times and nothing.

He thinks I may have pushed that button a few too many times and I might have flooded it. He suggested walking away and trying again in about 30 minutes.

Lunch Break! I took the kids and Chlo-bug to Sonic for lunch and happy hour drinks.

Came back with a new fresh attitude and even more determined to get that damn mower started.

This time I didn't push the button per Toms suggestion.

I pull the cord...
it doesn't start.
I pull again.
it doesn't start.
I pull again.
it doesn't start.
I pull again.
it doesn't start.

At this point I sat on my porch and cried. Not because I really wanted to cut the grass but because the damn green lawn mower was getting the best of me. When I get mad or frustrated I cry. So I threw myself a nice pity party right on my front porch. I am woman hear me cry.

So, I called Tom again. Told him what I did this time, and then started to cry again.

Being the sensitive soul he is he asked:

"Why the hell are you crying over mowing the grass"

Way to be supportive Babe! It is also a valid question!!!! At that point I just started to laugh. Because really what else CAN you do at that point.

His suggestion this time was to get down near the motor and tell him if I smelled gas at all.

So, I did and guess what? I smelled NO gas! Then he said push the button a few more times until I smell gas, then try to start it and call him back.

OKee dokee.

I did what he said.

I pulled the cord...

and the DAMN THING STARTED!

I was so excited I started to mow the grass and I forgot all about calling Tom back.

While I was mowing, I started to think that my punk of a 15 year old should be out here doing this. I mean the neighbors kid behind us does their lawn. What kind of punk did I raise anyhow....

I mowed half the yard when Kasey came out to tell me Tom called, and to go inside and call him back. Kasey also said he would finish the yard. God bless that kid! That was so nice of him to finish!

I go inside and I call Tom back. He wondered how I got the mower started. I explained that I took his advice and viola it started.

Then he says

Tom: Did Kasey go out and finish the yard like I told him to?
Me: Yes he did!!! But you told him to? I thought he was just being nice.
Tom: Hell no! I jumped his butt. I told that kid he ought to be ashamed letting his Mom mow the grass while he sat on his butt watching TV. So, I told him to get his butt outside pronto and get that yard done, get it done right.... NOW.
Me: I love it when you put the fear in him all the way from Maryland
Tom: Yeah, it's a gift.

So I may have won this battle but it did rain today, which means the grass is going to grow again.

Lord help me.

 

Comments

[Theresa]

Yeahhhhhhhhh!! You won!

Give your hubby a kiss from me for that one. He's the DAD and still rules from even from 1200 miles away.

It's an awwww moment in it's own right. :-)

[whit]

I am really embarrassed to admit this but I once wanted to surprise dh by mowing the lawn. Had never done it before...had to google "starting a lawn mower". Yeah, didn't help.