OK...so first of all.....HAPPY BLOGIVESARY TO ME!!!
I celebrated 2 years of blogging yesterday. GO ME!
And now for a proper update....
Life as we knew it before Tom left is finally making its way back around.
I cannot tell you how relieved I am for that.
Seriously.
This was the longest we have ever been apart.
If you had to live apart from your significant other for 5 months, do you think it would just go back to normal when he/she returned?
Well if you answered "Yes, I think it would" then you were thinking the same way I was. LOL
Which is why it threw me for such a loop.
Over the course of 17 years he has been gone for more than a month 7 times. Each of the previous 6 times we never skipped a beat. Not once.
This time however I was seriously questioning the stability of our marriage.
It was all in my head mind you and Tom went about his day as if nothing was wrong.
Typical LOL
How is that for being honest?
He really wasn't the one with the problem, it was 90% with me.
I was the one with a chip on my shoulder.
I was the one who was feeling a little bitter that I got "stuck" here with the kids while he was livin' large in MD. (He really wasn't livin' large but I certainly felt that I got the short end of the stick)
I was the one dealing with the day to day and ins and outs of our lives here.
YES I know I sound incredibly selfish. I am really not a selfish person IRL and that caused me a lot of frustration.
So that left me to deal with the issues I had in my head.
WHY was I feeling so bitter?
Why was I complaining about the medicine cabinet?
What about our situation has set me off?
Why was I feeling like he owed me something?
Why isn't he glad to see me every second of every minute of every day?
Why does he have to go to bed so damned early?
Why?
Why?
Why?
Why?
The answer?
I really didn't have any.
I finally told myself:
"Self, you really need to snap out of it. Yes, you did get the short end of the stick, but the previous 2 times he was gone HE got the shaft. Do you think he had a great time in Iraq? What about the other military families that have their SO's gone for YEARS and you are being a big fat baby."
Then I let myself be sad about it for one last time, I built a bridge and I got the hell over it.
This goes to prove that loving someone is truly a verb.
Onto the rest of my life.
OK...the past two weeks can be summed up in one word.
B U S Y.
This seems to be a recurrent theme in my life right now.
But it is ok....at least I am not bored right?
One thing that I have noticed is that I am not taking as many photographs.
Must change that.
Did you all forget that I take pictures?
It is a part of who I am.
I vow to take more pictures...even though my family refuse to cooperate I will do it anyway.
Enough babbling....I will update more often :)
well thank goodness for that!! I have checked daily for a new post... so sad when it wasn't there. but now- my Lori's back, my Lori's back, yeah!!!
Posted by: Annette Jaderholm | August 05, 2008 at 07:58 PM
Well there you are! Maybe you could start taking more pictures by photographing my family. I know we keep talking about it but we are ready!
Posted by: whitney kim | August 05, 2008 at 10:05 PM