Quote to live by...

"Do not invest in people who are emotionally unattainable" ~ Drew Barrymore.

My oldest sister gave me this quote awhile ago and I kept it in the back of my brain.

I am posting this quote tonight because...tonight these words hold true.

The last few months of 2009 were horrible. I discovered that the time and effort I put into relationships with certain people in my family were futile. This wasn't a new discovery by any means, I have been trying to make it work for YEARS. We have been estranged various times through out the years because I had enough.  But I always allowed them back in my life...not because I missed them, but because I didn't want to regret NOT doing it. I wanted my kids to have family like I did growing up. I compromised my feelings for the sake of theirs....and for what?

For what?

Just so I could get yelled at for trying to do something nice and then expect to go on as if nothing ever happened and never get an apology? Just so I could get stabbed in the back by someone I confided in? Just so I could get talked about on facebook? No Thanks.

Those people refuse to admit they have done anything hurtful. According them they have done nothing wrong. This has replayed more times in my life than I care to admit. Shame on me for that because I should have known better.

I fully admit I allowed myself to get wrapped up in the words I was hearing from them, but I realized their words didn't match their actions.

They were just words and empty words at that.

After the last stunts they pulled I was done. I realized I was the only one working on the relationships. They weren't doing anything, I was the one making the trips to see people, I was the one making the phone calls, I was the one doing the work...ME not them but ME.

Do not invest in people who are emotionally unattainable.

I stopped. I stopped caring what they did, what they said, what they tried to do to get a rise out of me...I stopped. I cannot change them but I can change how I react to them.

Tonight, was the true test. I received a phone call and when I saw the # come up I got nervous. The phone call was as I expected it to be. All about them, and their excuses. When they asked what was going on here I said "nothing". I will not divulge anything to them.

I will not invest in people who are emotionally unattainable.

Comments

[jenn]

i am so proud of you for putting yourself first and being a priority in your own life. you matter to me, i will always be here for you. you are my family and i love you! i would not be who i am without you. you are a beautiful, bright and funny woman who i am proud to call my friend. it saddens me that someone would try to make you feel like less. love you girl!